I guess I am kind of hoping one random person reads this, so it doesn’t feel like shouting in an empty room; but doesn’t feel like speaking to an actual person
So I am not sure I could say exactly what this blog is about or who it is intended for.
I would say it is for people who are constantly struggling with who they are, who they want to be, how they wish to be seen etc.
I am a nearly 30 year old woman who has had a life that could be viewed in many ways. As my therapist recently said, ‘you are someone who is very skilled at controlling the narrative of how you are viewed’; what a skill right!? This is my way of just being me without knowing the audience or having any expectations of how i wish to be viewed by them (you).
My hope from this is to put my thoughts to (digital) paper, and get them out of my mind, and to help prepare myself for essay writing for when i start a degree this year (yay me).
If you have any interest in any of the following, then my blog may interest you:
- Mental Health
- Emotional confusion
I am hoping by doing this I may connect with other humans who understand me, or at least find another good/interesting human being who wants to expand the human experience by learning from each other, with the added bonus of not actually having to meet or get out of PJs.
This will be heavily edited before posting so here goes…
I just watched the Taylor Swift documentary. Could i be anymore more of a basic white girl!? I swear I just grew a pair of ugg boots whilst watch, and a pumpkin latte materialised in my hand. But truly, I was stuck up about music for a long time, and accidentally listened to an acoustic cover of ‘mean’ and loved the lyrics so much i had to know who wrote it, my pretentious little heart dropped when i realised Taylor Swift wrote a song that i connected with on such a deep level. Was it a pop song, that was enjoyable to listen to? Yes. Did it very clearly sum up how it felt to have an abusive, controlling ex at a young age? YES! A pop beat that summed up an abusive relationship at the age of 15 (!?) wow, i didn’t have to feel sad listening to it, i could bop along the street, feeling strong, feeling understood, feeling like i wasn’t the only person in the world who had been so stupid. Love her or hate her, there is no denying that Taylor Swift is one of the most successful artists of our day (if not ever), and I felt like, ‘Hey, if she can be that stupid, as to let an idiot man, who didn’t deserve her, get the better of her; then maybe i am not a weak human, maybe i am just a human’. It has taken me a long time, and, unfortunately, another abusive relationship to realise some of my issues.
And I do feel the need (due to my own ego issues) that whilst I totally adore Tay Tay; normally my favourites are: Leonard Cohen, Prince, Rolling Stones, The Beatles and Dolly Parton. None of this is to ‘make up’ for like TS but just to give you a bigger view of me and my love of artist, that now i look at the list, are all song writers. Wow I just identified an importance whilst writing.
I would love to hear from any one, even if they just want to laugh at the pointlessness of my blog. Or the utterly terrible grammar (new chrome back, serious first world problems, it has a weird keyboard). At the same time I am going to carry on posting as shouting in the dark in this manner is making me feel a lot better than internalising everything and damaging myself.
Thank you for either reading or not, thanks for being a person. I can guarantee you are a great person; or at the very least, weird, and that is brilliant.
I’ll be your “one person” 🙂
Very random… and that’s excellent! 😀
Some taggng tips: use words, not longstringslikethis, and use stuff you actually WANT to share with other people (not sure “bad grammar” qualifies 😉 ).
Want more tips? Just ask and / or send me an email. ❤
[2020-04-22 07:57 UTC]