Two “need” and “want” terms are seemly referred to a lot in the economic realm. In this realm, they are easy to distinguish because of only based on the purchasing motivation of a person to determine. However, these words become more complicated when I consider them in different situations. I must say that it will be perilous if I use these rashly
LOVE
In the perspective of love, these two words are sensitive above all cases. Specifically, you should be careful whenever you say “I want you” unless you want your girl/boyfriend to misunderstand that you are just taking advantage of her/him for your physiology demand, and you should be serious whenever you say “I need you” if you don’t have the intention to maintain a long-time relationship with her/him. In my point of view, in love, “want” is more about sex and pleasure, while “need” is more about being ahead of the limitation of sex. Hence, I define true love which stems from the dependency on each other and each side leans on (or needs) each other to maintain and develop the relationship. Reversely, pragmatic love is when each side expects (or wants) each other as a tool to meet, serve, and satisfy the normal demand. Thus, when a person says that “I need you”, which means that he/she respects you and nurtures a sustainable future dream with you. In converse, when a person says that “I want you”, which means that he/she is only exploiting you; once he/she can possess you, he/she does not need to keep you. You are the only one to someone who feels deprived without you and needs you to fill up that person’s space in the heart. Otherwise, you do not play an important role in someone’s life if that person wants you because other countless people can be willing to satisfy that person’s demand apart from you. Conclude: In the love aspect, “I need you” is positive, “I want you” is negative
Marriage
In the marriage context, in most of the cases that love gradually turns into overshadowed, responsibility comes to the throne instead; as a result, both sides tie to each other. The evaluation of the two terms “want” and “need” in this family aspect is permuted, which means that “need” is negative, while “want” is positive. I think that, normally, in the family relationship, the partners often chafe that their wife/husband does not totally understand about their daily works. They slowly birth the negative thoughts of each other and repute their spouse as dependents. They think that their spouse cannot live without them as the penetrability becomes exhausted. Ultimately, they consider themselves the needed persons. However, the couples may needn’t each other because both of them are adults. In family life, the insiders have to share the sundry duties relating to house works, which arises the dependent psychology. Consequently, the spouse thinks that their life will not be perfect without the other. Albeit, in fact, a wife can live without her husband’s support, and reverse; of course, people undergoing a broken marriage understand this fact most. For instance, Lisa Arends – an author of Lesson from the End of a Marriage blogs shared that she mistakenly thought that she actually needed the attachment from her husband until she realized she could survive well after saying goodbye to him. Previously, she had never navigated adulthood without him because he could support her in work, maintain and upgrade their home on the cheap by his impressive carpentry, or soothe her when she felt stressed. However, she was wrong. That is a great lesson she could learn from her first marriage. Sometimes, being needed can feel good because it gives you purpose and duty in the marriage life. It awakes self-confidence and helps reduce the feelings of being alone because if someone needs you, he/she is unlikely to leave you. Nevertheless, if being needed is too much, it makes you feel burdened and seemly stuck in a prison. As a result, in the marriage context, you may desire to be wanted than to be needed because being wanted makes you still valuable and attractive in the eyes of your partner. “Need” is the basic thing, while “want” is beyond that basis. Conclude, in the marriage aspect, “I need you” is negative, “I want you” is positive
FRIENDSHIP
In friendship, people often use “need” or “don’t need” than “want” or “don’t want” because the “want” term implies a possession that seemly less appears. Unlike in marriage life or work environment, friendship is intrinsically equal. Once the equality is destroyed, that relationship is ruined. In friendship, when people need someone who also needs them, it symbols a reciprocal relationship. To be more specific, you and your close friend always need mutually when you would like to share something relating to life, work, family, study, etc., and expect support and help from the other. In this case, both of you are beneficial, so both are equal. The more equal reciprocity is maintained, the more the friendship is nurtured and developed. For instance, you may want a friend to go to the movie with you, but you need that friend to be punctual. So, “want” only describes an offer while “need” plays the coequal standard allowing the relationship to be healthy, trust, and respectful. In addition, the state of “want” in friendship is easy to lead to exploitation. It means that when someone wants you, they tend to want to take something from you. They are taking advantage of you to benefit themselves. Conclude: In the friendship aspect, “I need you” is positive, “I want you” is negative
WorkING environment
You can evaluate whether your seniors are good leaders or not by paying attention to the attitude when they transmit information or a requirement. There is a difference between a boss and a leader. A boss uses power to dominate the workplace and force the subordinates to do regarding his/her requirement. Thus, a boss often uses “I want you” more than “I need you”. Whereas, a leader uses power to help you be better. A leader normally is positive, empowering, inspiring, and acting for the development of all collective. Hence, a leader often says “I need you” more than “I want you”. For example, a boss will say “I want you to give me a marketing idea within this afternoon”, and a leader will slap your back and say “I need you to propose to me a marketing idea as soon as possible so that we can catch up with the process of project”. If you work with a boss, you are less respected because you are tied by his/her authority, then you are forced to do according to his/her commands without speaking up. In some cases, you may have a chance to speak up, but your idea will not be easy to accept. It is because your boss had the decision in the head, and listening to your idea just ensures the process is obeyed or hides the monopoly of the boss. Consequently, he/she only wants you to serve his/her decisions. Reversely, if you work with a leader, you have many opportunities to voice your ideas and those ideas will be respected, absorbed, and considered. The work environment is operated basing on the team mechanism than hierarchy. Therefore, you are needed to contribute to any project of the whole team. The leader is responsible for leading you and the team to the joint objective. Conclude: In the workplace, “I need you” is positive, “I want you” is negative
This blog is my personal view, i hope you read it in an open-hearted state!
You seem to have a lot of guts — I am speechless. Amazing! 😀 But also foolish? 😯
What makes you think you have such a level of sensitivity of these sorts of concepts — are you a native speaker of English? Do you study the English language? Are you an academic? Or do you simply feel confident enough to share your own insights this way?
Ask most people what makes a life meaningful, and most will say relationships. Breathe a little more. Lean, touch, and connect. The reality is, real love and real connections doesn’t come that cheaply. In love we may fight. Some of us run. We effectively cling to the other person, moving ourselves into their spaces and violate boundaries- ours and theirs. We get jealous, demanding, and emotional. We do more and then flail when we don’t get appreciated. Attachment is not love. I may have a male best friend; you may have a female best friend. You may be attached to him or her emotionally but that isn’t love. To love is not to ask anything in return, not even to feel that you are giving something. It does not involve addiction and compassion but rather lightness and compassion. It means being complete on your own and coping up with your partners mechanism and behaviours’. Love needs connection. The more connected you are, the healthier you will be both physically and emotionally. The less connected you are, the more you are at risk. If you and your partner stay away make it a point to call him or her up at least for a few minutes. Love does not mean you always need to talk over phone or meet regularly. But, the generation we are in, everything is risky. Make them understand that you miss them. The lesser you talk; the more is your relationship at risk. Be focused. Don’t let your love life ruin your aim in life. Love and career are two different paths. Don’t mix them up. Never. Love for many is simply attraction, distraction and infatuation. If you feel this you are not in love my friend. Love will not die even if you don’t get physical or even if you don’t meet up regularly. Never be demanding or controlling. Never ask your partner to think as you do or to do as you say. I have not been in many relationships. Seriousness means being loyal. If you want to take a break, want someone else as your partner, say it at once. It may hurt but do so. Never cheat on your partner. Don’t avoid falling in love. The more you avoid love; you are more likely to fall in love. Just do what you feel like. Never force yourself to do anything. They are many different types of people out there. You aren’t going to be compatible and comfortable with all of them. Be true to your partner. Open up your views, your experiences, your feelings, and your mind. Love is never perfect. If you are struggling with love, fight for it. You may succeed. Don’t just date because you don’t want to be alone or you don’t have a control over your sex hormones. Be loyal or leave. Never dream of your future. I believe in destiny. If we are meant to be together we will be, no matter what. Efforts are needed in love. You try at times and then you manage to be together for yet another couple of years. You grow up, become more mature with every passing day. And just as you start to appreciate the simplicity of being in love together, life took an obvious turn- college ended, and you start to work. Stress at work always propagates back home. Everyone needs to vent out the frustration and we understand that. Problems resurface when you couldn’t give each other the most basic thing in a relationship- time. Distance increases and things change. Don’t let this happen in your love life. Trust me it will be hard for you, very hard indeed. This is seen most in this generation. Prove this wrong. Your love story can’t be incomplete. Be strong, fight against everyone, fight against all odds, fight against all circumstances, be loyal, be true and just trust your partner and your destiny.
And even after lots of trials, if you don’t like the story you are in. Leave. You can’t let your mental peace be at risk for the sake of this relationship thing. Time heals everything. Life will be perfect one day. Trust me.
MOAP represented a search for the self, L O V E making embodies the exploration of that ‘found self’.
Being affected by several mental health problems from a young age, I have been continuously chasing a cure. I have been desperately seeking for the tools that could at least alleviate the suffering, especially during the recent years of my life.
Sometimes when the dreadful chaos would quiet down I would begin to notice that I am not alone. There are other souls silently screaming and crying. Observing this aspect is rather sadthan comforting.
Succeeding various methods of really suppressing the problem rather than holistically treating it, I ultimately found love. This might sound plain or appear to be a far too simple answer, but truly it is this simple. The complexity however, lays within the layers of love, the depths that can be reached through it.
Let me ask you a question. When was the last time you took yourself on a date? Offer love to yourself. Do not resist it. There is no need to. Stop running. Turn around and look at your Self. Embrace it. Accept it. Approve it. Strip-off and just be.All that is happening is happening within you. You are the one you are living with for the greatest part during this life. Build a conscious relationship with yourself. Let go of being alienated and estranged from yourself and welcome yourself.
L O V E making embodies a personal project focused on inspiring its audience to consider the emotion of love. The aim is to spark the interest in whoever might connect with the project to reflect on the idea of love. The objective is to make the audience feel.
The intent is situated far from the action of trapping the concept of love within words by attaching any labels to it. Love is subjective to every human being populating this great planet. Rather than providing a rigid, limited portrait of what love could mean, the focus is placed on the feeling.
The aim is attained by the fabrication of a collection / series of digitally manipulated self-portrait photographs. Additionally, the gentle colour palette weaving the aesthetic of the project alongside the shapes and the forms introduced also represent key elements supporting the intent. ( Note To Self: to be revised after the final outcome is produced )
L O V E making represents a form of transmission for the emotion of love. Transcending any social constructs such as gender, this project communicates to every individual who resonates with it.
In the WP “backend” interface, you can add more detailed information about category names — IMHO this may be very helpful, because names like “FMP” and “LM” seem quite cryptic.
You might be able to find better tutorials @ wordpress.tv but the basic ideo (IMHO) would be to add a description to the catagory data — I think this would also be shown whenever someone clicks on a category link.
Let me know (either via reply, via email or whatever) if you want / appreciate more help. 🙂
“Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?” Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.” — Matthew 22:36-40, NIV.
In the movie Interstellar, when Cooper entered the Tesseract, he was able to see the entirety of time from the beginning to the end, all at once. In it, he struggled to find a method of communication to communicate with his daughter, Murph. However, being trapped in a specific frame of space in Murph’s bedroom’s bookshelf, he found absolutely no way to communicate with her other than to tweak that fabric of space by shifting the second’s needle on Murph’s watch — the watch that he left with her before leaving for space.
God sees time in a way that is vastly different from us. He does not experience time in a linear manner the way we experience time. Rather, to Him, all times happen all the time. And for that matter, “all time is affecting all time, all the time”. That was what Cooper experienced in the Tesseract in the movie Interstellar. In the Tesseract, he was able to watch everything in Murph’s bedroom, from the beginning of the universe till the end of time. He was able to go back and forth and create subtle changes in the fabric of space to communicate to Murph. However, no matter how hard he tried, he was unable to communicate in a way that was understandable to her. To her, he was but a ghost in the bedroom.
In the same way, God is in a dimension that is completely different from ours. In a previous post, I wrote that God appears in two forms — 1) a physical appearance (in the form of Christ) and 2) in the form of a transcendent conscious entity. Let’s not look at Christ for the moment and zoom into the transcendent conscious entity. God experiences all times all at once. Because of that, everything happens in a sort of causality loop where what happens in the future affects what happens in the past, and vice versa.
Unlike Him, we experience time in a linear manner. We call this the arrow of time. We are trapped by the very notion of time, unable to advance faster than it nor are we able to go backwards, against it. We can however, transcend it by recording snippets of memories through different means (ie: books, journals, photographs, videos, audio recording, etc). We are able to relive the past even though we have advanced through time. We call this atemporality. We transcend time to experience something that happened in another time frame. Through atemporal access to incidences in other timeframes, we also experience emotions associated with it.
Atemporality does not only apply to past memories. Atemporality may also apply to future events. Say for example, a prophecy of a future disaster can invoke fear and hence, cause us to make necessary arrangements to tide through the perceived disaster. In the Old Testament, the prophecy of a coming Messiah will invoke reverence, awe, and hope for the people of Israel. Hence, it kept the Israelites focused on God and on the hope of a coming “kingdom”. In other words, emotions is the one thing that transcends spatial dimensions of space and time. This was why Paul wrote, “for now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love” (1 Corinthians 13:12-13, NIV). It was his faith that connected with God. It was the hope he placed in the knowledge of a future promise of God that got him to continue doing what he was doing. It was his love of God and his love for God that held his entire being together.
We wouldn’t have memories or hope of an incident or someone if we have not taken into heart what it meant to us. The sacrifice of Christ would mean nothing to us if we have not experienced the immense love that comes alongside it. This was why Murph was compelled to return to the watch that Cooper gave her. It was an artefact of Cooper’s love for her. It was something that helps her connect with Cooper.
Now, we can never be able to experience something if we do not know about it. Murph will not be able to love Cooper in such a profound way if not for her experience of his love towards her. No one can experience the magnitude of love unless they are aware of that such a love exist. Hence, it is the job of the Christian to share the love of God in a way we experienced. In Paul’s words, “How, then, can they call on the one they have not believed in? And how can they believe in the one of whom they have not heard? And how can they hear without someone preaching to them? And how can anyone preach unless they are sent? As it is written: ‘How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news!’” (Romans 10:14-15, NIV).
The question therefore, is whether or not have we experienced God in a deep way that allows us to communicate with Him regardless of situation? Have we experienced Him talking to us? Him shaping our lives? Him journeying with us? Him revealing Himself to us? Have we meditated on what the sacrifice of Christ on the cross meant to us? Have we meditated on what He did at the last supper? Do we “do these in remembrance of Me” (Mark 14:22-25, Luke 22:18-20, 1 Corinthians 11:23-25)?
No matter how much God loves us, if we do not reciprocate our love towards Him, we will not be able to receive His message, let alone communicate with Him.
No matter how much God loves us, if we do not reciprocate our love towards Him, we will not be able to receive His message, let alone communicate with Him. However, it is only through our love for God that gives God the confidence to communicate in a way that will be able reach us. Hence, on our part, we are to wait upon Him to speak to us through the actions He had done on earth, through the words He had written down for us in scriptures, and through the daily meditation of His words. When we are sensitive to what He is doing in our lives, when His promises speaks to us at our lowest point in life, when the Holy Spirit shows Himself and journey with us through our darkest times, we are to savour the moment and form a holographic memory of all that happened. Savour the moment; all the words that was said, all the things that happened, all the peace that was felt, all the people that you met, all the details that you experience.
Having stored these memories in your head, we are to return to them, just as how Christ called His disciples to return to Jerusalem after His ascension. Return to the place where the Saviour was pierced. Return to the place where it hurts the most. Return to the place where the Saviour meets you. Return to the place where you journeyed with the Saviour. There, at the lowest point of your encounter, the Saviour will overwhelm you by causing His power to descend upon you. There, at your deepest meditation, the Saviour will shake the very fabric of spatial dimension and communicate with you. There, at your lowest, the Saviour will show His love to you.
What does the word “science” mean to you? (in particular here?) What does it take for something to qualify as “scientific”?
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